Why I am now a Christian (2024)

(Late to this party, but!) Former Protestant, then Eastern Orthodox, now agnostic atheist here, who’s fascinated by Islam (how awful it is, specifically). I’ve long admired the courage of Ayaan Hirsi Ali and all ex-Muslims, and I’m glad if she’s found a spiritual home.

But several elements of her message seem … odd. Here’s three.

FIRST: For a longtime public professional atheist writer and speaker, Hirsi Ali has a wacky take on what “atheism” is and does.

After she identifies the most pernicious threats to the west (two of which — Putin’s Russia and global Islamism — are backed by major world religions), she wonders what commonality we (Westerners) all could use as a bulwark against them — then sighs, “The response that ‘God is dead!’ seems insufficient.”

To which I say, “Well, duh.” A can opener and a bouquet of pink roses would also be insufficient for that task.

Not only is The West comprised of 70 countries of people of thousands of different creeds and levels of religiosity (and therefore no religious commonality, but a history of strife between religions), “God is dead” isn’t even a pro-atheist slogan in the first place. (Did she think it was?) It’s an acknowledgment that one value system has collapsed in the West and a new one will have to be built.

Hirsi Ali then repeats the point in different words, dismissing atheism as “too weak and divisive a doctrine to fortify us against our menacing foes.”

To which I (again) say “Well, duh.” (The reader can insert a couple of irrelevant tools here.)

That’s because “atheism,” as Hirsi Ali should know, isn’t a doctrine of any sort. It simply identifies a disbelief (or lack of belief) in God, nothing more. It’s not a philosophy, value system, or moral code — we atheists derive our morals and ethics from the culture around us (local laws and customs; actual philosophies; our parents, extended family, neighbors and teachers; our social groups and those who inspire us) rather than from ancient texts. Truth be told, most religious folks derive their morals and ethics the same way. (If someone parks in your spot and your reaction references Deuteronomy, that’s a problem!)

I understand the confusion. In the U.S., for example, the majority of atheists lean left. But that’s largely because since the 1800s, Protestant Christians and skeptic groups grew largely in reaction against each other. There’s plenty of right-leaning atheists, though, not to mention the world’s other 1.8 billion atheists who can’t be classified according to American politics and who have little in common besides atheism.

Atheists can be good and bad people, educated and ignorant, hate religion or just not care about it. There’s atheists who accept Darwin’s theory of evolution and atheists who believe humankind was planted here by green men in UFOs. Still not convinced? Then ask yourself whether any given atheist in Denver or Milwaukee “belongs to the same religion” as any given atheist in Japan, Norway, China Germany, South Korea, or Vietnam.

So Hirsi Ali’s lament that “Atheism failed to answer a simple question: what is the meaning and purpose of life?” is like blaming a single wrench for not being able to overhaul your engine. For an ex-Christian or ex-Muslim, “unbelief” isn’t the solution, but the FIRST step on a journey to find one’s OWN meaning (which can be tremendously powerful and affirming). It seems strange that someone as knowledgeable as Hirsi Ali doesn’t see this.

SECOND: Many people have “God-shaped boxes” that provoke loneliness and insecurity if left empty. And If Hirsi Ali needed to fill that box, I’m very grateful she chose Christianity rather than reverting to Islam. But her essay doesn’t really explain how Christianity solves the problems she found in Islam.

Don’t get me wrong: In the current era, Islam (particularly Jihadist/Islamist groups) are a much, much larger danger worldwide than Christianity is. (We Americans should be able to admit that without disregarding the danger Christian Nationalism poses to our own democracy.)

For example, Hirsi Ali doesn’t say what branch or denomination of Christianity she’s joined. She doesn’t have to. But many of them still warn of everlasting hell for sinners and unbelievers (including Jews who don’t convert), and a few forbid “music, dancing and cinema.”

To be clear: Even the most conservative form of Christianity today is nowhere NEAR as confining as almost all forms of modern Islam. Today’s Christians aren’t cutting the hands off of thieves, throwing gays off buildings, stoning adulterers or lashing consenting adults for premarital sex. No Christians are stabbing artists to death for drawing pictures of Jesus. Nor do ex-Christians fear execution, as ex-Muslims do. There is truly no comparison between Islam today and Christianity today.

All that said, many forms of Christianity have blood on their hands for past atrocities, and some continue to inflict emotional and spiritual abuse to believers. It almost seems like Hirsi Ali imagines Christianity as always having been as tolerant and inclusive as some forms are now, when these are fairly modern developments —influenced, ironically, by secularism.

Moreover, in defending Western civilization, Hirsi Ali appears to pit “faith” (that is, Christianity) against “nihilism” (China, Russia and Iran) … while somehow ignoring the fact that Iran and Putin’s Russia are on fire with the RELIGIOUS spirit of radical islam and (regrettably) Russian Orthodox Christianity. (Just because some believers align themselves with evil movements, as we see them, does not mean they aren’t “true believers.”)

It’s interesting that Hirsi Ali picks up the shield of Christianity to fight battles in 2023. The “Judeo-Christianity” she embraces isn’t a real thing: it’s an idea largely promoted in post-WWII America to make our society seem more strongly amalgamated than it really was. But it never reflected true acceptance of Jews. We can see how things are going now in the horrific growth of antisemitism against Israel’s military response to a Muslim aggressor.

It’s also a weird choice given that Christianity’s weakening impact on the world in recent decades. Many Western nations that were formally majority Christian are now mostly secular; interestingly, divorce and violent crime rates are also decreasing, and literacy and women’s rights are increasing. Maybe Hirsi Ali finds comfort in embracing the past, but she’ll have a problem finding team members this way.

THIRD: Hirsi Ali likely didn’t write the headline “Why I am now a Christian,” but throughout her essay she says that she now “calls herself” a Christian. She’s also written an essay listing the strategic reasons she finds Christianity superior to Islam.

But nowhere does she mention coming to actually believe in God or Christ. And I don’t mean by the narrow definition Evangelicals and Pentacostals use (“accepting Jesus as personal savior,” “being born again,” or whatever). She doesn’t mention any transformative or spiritual connection with any diety whatsoever.

And that’s fine. I’m not judging her. But logical facts don’t always translate to an inner conviction of religious truth. No one can “force” themselves into a supernatural belief, even if they really want to. It sounds like Hirsi Ali really wants to. But she hasn’t yet.

Why I am now a Christian (2024)
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